I've been having some very insightful conversations lately with some of my freinds about relationships lately. And what is interesting about them all is that they have to do with the communication aspect of how they interact with people they're dealing with. More specifically most of what they were talking about had to deal with relaying certain messages to their significant other on the dynamics of their relationship. It was interesting to hear what they had to say on the subject because I always come from a different POV.
The one point that really stuck out to me the most in all of their stories was when each of them proclaimed they didn't want a relationship with the person they were dealing with but were doing relationship actions. What part of the game is that? You want to play house with them but not purchase the home? And that my friends is where the dilemma lies; you can't say you don't want something serious to happen with someone else and do the opposite without it leading to all types of confusion.
Sure, you can make it clear in SAYING that you don't want something to happen but as the old addage goes 'actions speak louder than words'. You can't honestly expect the other person in a situation that 'is what it is' (Sidebar: I hate that saying when it comes to relationships...it really grinds my gears) to not catch feelings after a while if you are 'playing relationship' for a significant amount of time. Regardless of what people say, everyone catches feelings at one point or another. You can't fault the other party for hoping that a relationship will develop if your words ultimately don't match up with what you're doing.
On the flip side, falling for someone is a choice that the other person decided to make. If said person chooses to fall for that person after they say they are not willing to be 100% in it, then you can't really blame the other party for what you decided to do. Nobody told you you have to be in that relationship, it was a conscious decision that person ultimately put on themselves. And as one of my dear friend say, which is secretly the gospel 'Life is all about decisions'.
Be that as it may, most of the problems that were brought up in the various situations that were explained to me could be solved by having your words and your actions correspond with one another. Simply saying something to a person you want to deal with ultimately means nothing if you do actions to prove otherwise. If you just mean what you say and stand stedfastly stand behind that it can really clean up most of the mess that most people go thorugh.
Sigh...the beat goes on
Until next time folks '...Keep calm and carry on'
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