'Tell me why do I find that the blind is always tryin' to lead the blind, they always go something to say everyday about the way you do your thing...' -Mya
Why does it always seem that people always want to tell you things that they know nothing about? I think people just have a natural reaction to say something or offer some advice on everything just to seem as though they're paying attention to the conversation. Well here's a word of advice, DON'T SPEAK ON THINGS YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!!! I mean this in the nicest way possible. =)
I can understand wanting to help friends and offer encouraging words to help your friends, but most of the time if you dont know what you're talking about then you're doing more damage than good. But the people who give the advice aren't the only culprits in this case, the people who TAKE the advice are as much to blame for most of their outcomes. If you take advice from someone you know doesn't know what they're talking about or doesn't think along the lines that you do, then you have no one to blame but yourself.
Think about it, why would you ask someone who lives their life in a completely different manner than you do on anything even remotely important? That's like asking a crackhead to do your taxes, it just doesn't make any sense. In all honesty, there is no 'right' answer for taking advice from someone, it's all up to your discrestion. People listen to what they want to hear most of the time, so just use your own good judgement to determine what works best for you. But keep in mind, the best advice comes from people who have actually been what you're going through, not the ones who can only imagine it.
Until next time folks '...Keep calm and carry on'
Friday, October 29, 2010
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
BITCH I'm Beautiful!!!
You ever just look at yourself and just say, 'Damn, I look good!!'. If you haven't you should....
We are all created to God's specific design so why not celebrate what we have? Sure we all have our own unique insecurities and problems but instead of complaining about them embrace them. Being beautiful doesn't always mean being physically appealing to everyone, it includes a greater composition of what makes you YOU. It's very possible to be the prettiest person in the room but be the 'ugliest' person in your life if your mind and attitude aren't on point.
Being beautiful (in my opinion) means accepting yourself and others in ways that go beyond how you look. It's embracing your flaws, it's feeling comfortable in your skin, it's accepting others for who they are and most importantly it's letting your true light shine through for the world to see. When people see the real you and you let your genuine nature show people can feel it and sense you're truly being yourself and that's a beautiful thing.
It's my personal belief that physical beauty should be a plus not a priority, but when you have your mind and your body right why not celebrate it? Yeah you may not feel too pretty on some days but just know you are always gonna be the best looking you you can ever be. And nothing's better than that. So get into yourself and love every minute of it!!!
I mean why not? If you're feelin' it, FEEL IT!!! So the next time you walk past a mirror, stop real quick, look yourself up and down, and shout 'BITCH, I'm beautiful!!'
Until next time folks '...keep calm and carry on'
We are all created to God's specific design so why not celebrate what we have? Sure we all have our own unique insecurities and problems but instead of complaining about them embrace them. Being beautiful doesn't always mean being physically appealing to everyone, it includes a greater composition of what makes you YOU. It's very possible to be the prettiest person in the room but be the 'ugliest' person in your life if your mind and attitude aren't on point.
Being beautiful (in my opinion) means accepting yourself and others in ways that go beyond how you look. It's embracing your flaws, it's feeling comfortable in your skin, it's accepting others for who they are and most importantly it's letting your true light shine through for the world to see. When people see the real you and you let your genuine nature show people can feel it and sense you're truly being yourself and that's a beautiful thing.
It's my personal belief that physical beauty should be a plus not a priority, but when you have your mind and your body right why not celebrate it? Yeah you may not feel too pretty on some days but just know you are always gonna be the best looking you you can ever be. And nothing's better than that. So get into yourself and love every minute of it!!!
I mean why not? If you're feelin' it, FEEL IT!!! So the next time you walk past a mirror, stop real quick, look yourself up and down, and shout 'BITCH, I'm beautiful!!'
Until next time folks '...keep calm and carry on'
Friday, October 22, 2010
How Unfortunate....
We all know the face...and you ALL know what I'm talking about.
Here's the scenario: You're meet a whole new group of people and you're doing the standard 'getting to know you process'. Everyone is having a good time, eating, laughing, and loving like those happy white folks do in the movie. Then it all happens...the question of death, and you know who it's coming from too. The only couple in said group asks you the all important question: 'So are you single?' and the room becomes deathly silent. At that moment all conversation stops and all attention is squarely on you. Are you or aren't you? Then you utter the three magic words 'Yes I am' and that's where the looks begin. All the people who are coupled up look at you with the look most people give the starving kids from Africa on those 'feed the children commercials'. I like to call that the 'condescension special'; because heaven forbid your single by choice.
What is up with that anyway? Why do people in society feel as though being single is a punishment worse than death? It seems as though a single person is in automatic contention for a life doomed to be lived alone with 20 cats and an imaginary friend that's really a volleyball. Being single doesn't make you the bane of everyone's existence or mean that something's wrong with you, it just your relationship status at the moment. Who's to say that you always need to be with someone to define your happiness and make you whole?
Most of the people that are silently judging you for being single have that very problem!!! They find security in their mate and don't really take the time to get right with themselves. So they define being whole by being with someone and that's where they get the game completely wrong. Being by yourself, gives you time to really 'get into' yourself, and learn more about what you are capable of. Not to mention you learn how much and how long your capable of going without some things that you may have once thought only another body could bring you. Being single should be worn as a badge of honor, taken in regards in the highest regard of any situation. So the next time, someone gives you the 'condescension special' when you tell them you're single simply proclaim...
I AM SINGLE, HEAR ME ROAR!!!
(P.S. u might wanna change that temporarily while it's cuffin' season though #imjustsayin)
Until next time folks '...Keep calm and carry on'
Here's the scenario: You're meet a whole new group of people and you're doing the standard 'getting to know you process'. Everyone is having a good time, eating, laughing, and loving like those happy white folks do in the movie. Then it all happens...the question of death, and you know who it's coming from too. The only couple in said group asks you the all important question: 'So are you single?' and the room becomes deathly silent. At that moment all conversation stops and all attention is squarely on you. Are you or aren't you? Then you utter the three magic words 'Yes I am' and that's where the looks begin. All the people who are coupled up look at you with the look most people give the starving kids from Africa on those 'feed the children commercials'. I like to call that the 'condescension special'; because heaven forbid your single by choice.
What is up with that anyway? Why do people in society feel as though being single is a punishment worse than death? It seems as though a single person is in automatic contention for a life doomed to be lived alone with 20 cats and an imaginary friend that's really a volleyball. Being single doesn't make you the bane of everyone's existence or mean that something's wrong with you, it just your relationship status at the moment. Who's to say that you always need to be with someone to define your happiness and make you whole?
Most of the people that are silently judging you for being single have that very problem!!! They find security in their mate and don't really take the time to get right with themselves. So they define being whole by being with someone and that's where they get the game completely wrong. Being by yourself, gives you time to really 'get into' yourself, and learn more about what you are capable of. Not to mention you learn how much and how long your capable of going without some things that you may have once thought only another body could bring you. Being single should be worn as a badge of honor, taken in regards in the highest regard of any situation. So the next time, someone gives you the 'condescension special' when you tell them you're single simply proclaim...
I AM SINGLE, HEAR ME ROAR!!!
(P.S. u might wanna change that temporarily while it's cuffin' season though #imjustsayin)
Until next time folks '...Keep calm and carry on'
The 2 Week Rule
So something just happened...
It's really big and its a really juicy piece of info that if it got out I could be looked at in a completely different way by everybody. I just HAVE to tell my friends about this!!! But wait, it's a little too embarrassing for anyone to know about. UGH!!!! I feel so bad for not wanting to tell them because they are my friends, and I know they'll be there for me regardless of whatever I do. But I can't STAND to hear the 'I told you so' and the sound of disappointment in their voice. How long should I wait to tell them?
You ever been in that situation? Where you have something really private and maybe a little embarrassing/disappointing happen that you don't want people to know about and can't share with anyone? Not even your closest friends because you kind of want to wish it to just go away? Yeah me too. Recently I was talking with one of my closest friends about how long is too long for time to go by to not tell your closest friends any piece of information that they might need to be up on. And from that conversation we came up with a '2 week rule', that says if you let any piece of information that is imperative go past 2 weeks and don't tell anyone about it, especially your best friends, then that's shady. I mean your best friends should love and accept you through any situation but does EVERY piece of information need to be shared?
To begin with, I think it's a fair rule to go with but I also find some flaws in that theory.There are certain circumstances that you feel shouldn't be discussed at all with anyone (relationships, family issues, etc.) because they are sacred to you and you still do need your own personal thoughts and opinions. But for the stuff that's for the greater good of the relationship at hand with your friends I feel there should be no boundaries. Things of critical importance need to be shared asap and without hesitation. Because if you don't think to tell your friends how you feel about certain events in a timely manor then (IMO) you really don't think that much of them.
Your friends are a reflection of yourself in some way, shape, or form. And since they stand for different facets of your personality, sometimes it's vital for them to give you different opinions and viewpoints of some situations. Withholding information from them isn't the worst thing in the world but it speaks volumes on how much you trust them to handle certain things in a certain way.
So let's jut say you've gotten to the point where you've past the 2 weeks without telling your friend the information, now what? Well if you have good friends they will probably be over you but understand where you're coming from and still have your best intentions at heart regardless of what it is. So whether or not you agree with the '2 week rule' have enough faith in your real friends to know that they will be there for you through thick and thin, and share the information you need to tell. But don't make it too long...cuz that's shady ;)
Until next time folks '....Keep calm and carry on'
It's really big and its a really juicy piece of info that if it got out I could be looked at in a completely different way by everybody. I just HAVE to tell my friends about this!!! But wait, it's a little too embarrassing for anyone to know about. UGH!!!! I feel so bad for not wanting to tell them because they are my friends, and I know they'll be there for me regardless of whatever I do. But I can't STAND to hear the 'I told you so' and the sound of disappointment in their voice. How long should I wait to tell them?
You ever been in that situation? Where you have something really private and maybe a little embarrassing/disappointing happen that you don't want people to know about and can't share with anyone? Not even your closest friends because you kind of want to wish it to just go away? Yeah me too. Recently I was talking with one of my closest friends about how long is too long for time to go by to not tell your closest friends any piece of information that they might need to be up on. And from that conversation we came up with a '2 week rule', that says if you let any piece of information that is imperative go past 2 weeks and don't tell anyone about it, especially your best friends, then that's shady. I mean your best friends should love and accept you through any situation but does EVERY piece of information need to be shared?
To begin with, I think it's a fair rule to go with but I also find some flaws in that theory.There are certain circumstances that you feel shouldn't be discussed at all with anyone (relationships, family issues, etc.) because they are sacred to you and you still do need your own personal thoughts and opinions. But for the stuff that's for the greater good of the relationship at hand with your friends I feel there should be no boundaries. Things of critical importance need to be shared asap and without hesitation. Because if you don't think to tell your friends how you feel about certain events in a timely manor then (IMO) you really don't think that much of them.
Your friends are a reflection of yourself in some way, shape, or form. And since they stand for different facets of your personality, sometimes it's vital for them to give you different opinions and viewpoints of some situations. Withholding information from them isn't the worst thing in the world but it speaks volumes on how much you trust them to handle certain things in a certain way.
So let's jut say you've gotten to the point where you've past the 2 weeks without telling your friend the information, now what? Well if you have good friends they will probably be over you but understand where you're coming from and still have your best intentions at heart regardless of what it is. So whether or not you agree with the '2 week rule' have enough faith in your real friends to know that they will be there for you through thick and thin, and share the information you need to tell. But don't make it too long...cuz that's shady ;)
Until next time folks '....Keep calm and carry on'
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Don't Try, Just Be...
Sometimes I want to be something I'm not...
I admire people that can be unapologetic and brazen when they step in the room. I give respect to those who have the courage to be themselves regardless of any situation and are larger than life. I even respect some people who may not always make the right decisions and live their lives on the edge regardless of the situation. And while I embody some of those qualities, I don't quite take it to the extreme. Most of the times, I'm safe with what i say as to not offend many people. Sometimes, I don't speak up as to not 'rock the boat' in many a situation. And most of the time my rebellion to society isn't that rebellious but a little more than tame. And with that I admit, there are times when I try to be some of the people I encounter that have these qualities because I respect their stance on life that is often opposite of what I am. I take on some of their qualities and mannerisms to empower myself and become sort of a caricature of myself. Sort of like my version of (insert person here).
Sad I know, but hear me out....
I don't want you to think that I don't love myself and everything about me, but there are just moments when I want to just take on another persona that is so far left of what i actually am. I think it's just because I want to escape the reality and monotony that is my life and see the world from a different point of view. Sometimes I get lost in a facade of a perfect world that other people portray themselves to be in and want to be in that world so badly because it's not mine. Just to feel how they feel and see things how they do to feel something different than what I do. The trouble with that though is when engage in that behavior I usually get lost in their identity and lose my own. I end up living vicariously through someone else's life instead of living my own and appreciating everything that makes me great.
Does this sound like you?
I feel most people have a complex with seeing the grass as greener in everyone else's pasture because of the facade most people put up as reality. And usually, when you try to live vicariously through someone's borrowed lifestyle it never fits on you right. Kind of like how a signature scent only smell's good on the original person who wears it and stinks on everyone else. It's best just to be yourself in life because there is only one you. The struggle of just being us is already hard enough to bear without trying to being someone else.
So let your freak flag fly fuckers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Unitl next time folks '...keep calm and carry on'
I admire people that can be unapologetic and brazen when they step in the room. I give respect to those who have the courage to be themselves regardless of any situation and are larger than life. I even respect some people who may not always make the right decisions and live their lives on the edge regardless of the situation. And while I embody some of those qualities, I don't quite take it to the extreme. Most of the times, I'm safe with what i say as to not offend many people. Sometimes, I don't speak up as to not 'rock the boat' in many a situation. And most of the time my rebellion to society isn't that rebellious but a little more than tame. And with that I admit, there are times when I try to be some of the people I encounter that have these qualities because I respect their stance on life that is often opposite of what I am. I take on some of their qualities and mannerisms to empower myself and become sort of a caricature of myself. Sort of like my version of (insert person here).
Sad I know, but hear me out....
I don't want you to think that I don't love myself and everything about me, but there are just moments when I want to just take on another persona that is so far left of what i actually am. I think it's just because I want to escape the reality and monotony that is my life and see the world from a different point of view. Sometimes I get lost in a facade of a perfect world that other people portray themselves to be in and want to be in that world so badly because it's not mine. Just to feel how they feel and see things how they do to feel something different than what I do. The trouble with that though is when engage in that behavior I usually get lost in their identity and lose my own. I end up living vicariously through someone else's life instead of living my own and appreciating everything that makes me great.
Does this sound like you?
I feel most people have a complex with seeing the grass as greener in everyone else's pasture because of the facade most people put up as reality. And usually, when you try to live vicariously through someone's borrowed lifestyle it never fits on you right. Kind of like how a signature scent only smell's good on the original person who wears it and stinks on everyone else. It's best just to be yourself in life because there is only one you. The struggle of just being us is already hard enough to bear without trying to being someone else.
So let your freak flag fly fuckers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Unitl next time folks '...keep calm and carry on'
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Acts and Identities
Im Gay....
Powerful statement right? There's a lot of feelings and emotions that go along with this word when it comes to dealing with people in society. Just saying the word out loud gives me a feeling in the pit of my stomach that stirs up all kinds of emotions. The word has so much gravity to it that we as a society seem to personify it and make it its own entity. The word 'gay' takes on its own persona that envelops a person and everything they do to a point where that person is no longer themselves but the identifier that they choose to be. It's not just about being yourself; it's about being your GAY self. Which completely changes everything about you in our society right?
When I look over how people depict other people in my everyday life its a sad reality how many of us make certain assumptions about a person solely based on what they do. It's not even just about being gay, black, white, man, woman, or whatever you identifier is; it's the societal expectation that goes along with being that identifier that gets me. Like when someone says to a black person 'Why are you speaking like that?Are you trying to act white?' Why would you imply that black people should speak with a slang and sound ignorant simply because they're black? Better yet, when someone assumes a man is emotionless because they are a male. Or conversely, when they assume a woman is weak and emotional just because she is a female.
When people confuse acts and identities with a person's true personality, it gets to be an uncomfortable situation for most because they don't define that person most of the time. My being gay doesn't define my identity; it's just an act that I choose to partake in. How I speak doesn't define me as a black man or 'what I'm trying to be' in any way shape or form, but rather shows how I choose to express myself. Being a man or a woman doesn't relegate you to certain character traits or beliefs; they just let you know if you have a penis or a vagina. (Crass I know but you get the point lol)
Most of the beliefs people have about others is mostly based on stereotypes and other preconceived notions that usually end up being false anyway. Most of the acts I choose to do in my life don't necessarily define me as a person because they only show one facet of my life in particular situations. And because I'm human I can never be confined to a one dimensional description of my personality or identifier.
So I guess the next time someone asks whether im gay or not....I'll reply 'I'm not gay, I'm Kyle...complex individual'
Until next time folks '...Keep calm and carry on'
Powerful statement right? There's a lot of feelings and emotions that go along with this word when it comes to dealing with people in society. Just saying the word out loud gives me a feeling in the pit of my stomach that stirs up all kinds of emotions. The word has so much gravity to it that we as a society seem to personify it and make it its own entity. The word 'gay' takes on its own persona that envelops a person and everything they do to a point where that person is no longer themselves but the identifier that they choose to be. It's not just about being yourself; it's about being your GAY self. Which completely changes everything about you in our society right?
When I look over how people depict other people in my everyday life its a sad reality how many of us make certain assumptions about a person solely based on what they do. It's not even just about being gay, black, white, man, woman, or whatever you identifier is; it's the societal expectation that goes along with being that identifier that gets me. Like when someone says to a black person 'Why are you speaking like that?Are you trying to act white?' Why would you imply that black people should speak with a slang and sound ignorant simply because they're black? Better yet, when someone assumes a man is emotionless because they are a male. Or conversely, when they assume a woman is weak and emotional just because she is a female.
When people confuse acts and identities with a person's true personality, it gets to be an uncomfortable situation for most because they don't define that person most of the time. My being gay doesn't define my identity; it's just an act that I choose to partake in. How I speak doesn't define me as a black man or 'what I'm trying to be' in any way shape or form, but rather shows how I choose to express myself. Being a man or a woman doesn't relegate you to certain character traits or beliefs; they just let you know if you have a penis or a vagina. (Crass I know but you get the point lol)
Most of the beliefs people have about others is mostly based on stereotypes and other preconceived notions that usually end up being false anyway. Most of the acts I choose to do in my life don't necessarily define me as a person because they only show one facet of my life in particular situations. And because I'm human I can never be confined to a one dimensional description of my personality or identifier.
So I guess the next time someone asks whether im gay or not....I'll reply 'I'm not gay, I'm Kyle...complex individual'
Until next time folks '...Keep calm and carry on'
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